Impact

Home: Family & Friends: For Family and Friends: Sibling sexual abuse

Sibling sexual abuse can have serious immediate and long term effects on victims. Some of these include:

Feeling responsible

Many survivors state that they feel they were in some way to blame for their abuse. This can be particularly so when they were close in age to the abusive sibling. This feeling of "being in it together", of being a co-conspirator rather than a victim, does not acknowledge the power dynamics that existed, and further adds to feelings of guilt, shame and embarrassment.

Some survivors may feel responsible for the "fall out" that follows a disclosure of sibling abuse, or may feel responsible for keeping the family together.

Sense of betrayal

Sibling sexual abuse is a gross abuse of trust. Survivors often reveal feeling betrayed by their sibling who they feel they should have been able to love and trust. They may also feel betrayed by parents who failed to protect them.

Shame

Many survivors describe their childhood as a lonely time, with their experiences of abuse leaving them feeling isolated from, and different to other children. Survivors will often reveal feelings of shame and deep embarrassment connected to being sexually assaulted by a brother or sister.

Adult survivors can wrestle with especially shameful feelings if they feel they did not fight off a sibling's sexual advances or if they sought out that affection. These feelings can be particularly strong if the age difference between the siblings is not great.

Grief and loss

It is common for survivors to express feelings of sadness over the loss of a normal healthy sibling relationship. Feelings of grief for the past and future relationship can be deep.

For some, the realisation that their relationship with a brother or sister, their closest genetic relative, is not as they wished or hoped it to be, comes with an enormous sense of sorrow.

If you wish to discuss sexual abuse issues please contact

Victorian Sexual Assault Crisis Line on 1800 806 292
or your nearest CASA at www.casa.org.au

Sponsor

South Western Centre Against Sexual Assault

Disclaimer Copyright Updated: 19 Mar 2011