Myths about the abuser

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Myth: He only did it because he loves children

Fact: While there may be many reasons why people choose to sexually abuse children, the idea that it is an extension of a loving relationship does not hold any weight. If men are threatening children to keep them silent or physically hurting them, or if children are so afraid of the abuse and so damaged by it, then this behaviour does not represent love. People who love children do not have sex with them. Sexually abusing children is an abuse of the trust that should exist between a child and an adult, an abuse of the power that an adult has over a child, and, where the abuser is a father or stepfather, a betrayal of the special bond between a parent and child.

Myth: He was abused as a child, so he could not help it

A reason some people use to excuse child sexual offenders is to argue that as a child the offender was abused and therefore he cannot help abusing children.

Fact: Some people who abuse children have been abused as children themselves. However, most people who have been abused do not go on to abuse their own or other people's children. Girls are more likely to be sexually abused than boys, yet overwhelmingly men are the perpetrators of sexual abuse.

Myth: Women never sexually abuse children

Fact: The majority of those who sexually abuse children are men. However some women do sexually abuse their own and other people's children. Many people find it particularly distressing to believe that women sexually abuse. The same issues such as exploitation of the child and the abuse of the child's trust remain when a child is abused by a woman.

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Disclaimer Copyright Updated: 11 Jun 2010